Just a rant.....

Life is, metaphorically speaking, lacking all nutrients. It is a journey from the unknown to the unknown. Leaving the traveler completely lost the whole way there. Lately I have realized that everything I think and feel has been constructed by something out of my hands. I have been flirting with success my entire life. One minute longing for it, the next believing there is no such thing. As I continue my path to nowhere, I realize the trail is bare. It essentially has no substance to keep you on it (Disclaimer: this is not a suicide rant). Therefore it is lacking all nutritional value.

Where am I going with this? Honestly no clue. Just a rant. My mind is flooded with hopes, dreams, and regrets. It is a shame that the emotional box does not always get filled for people. That they go about life not really having any substance because they were never taught they had any. The worst part is when you realize the source of the flaw and you sound ungrateful for pointing it out. Those who are supposed to love and support you don’t always know how. Sometimes they think they are, but they just aren’t keeping the lines of communication open to where they can get feedback. Many people won’t admit when they hurt someone. Instead they put their guard up and get angry. I think most have been guilty of this from one time or another. We create defense strategies just to wake up in the morning.

I have needed nutrients my entire life. I have needed the “I love you” I only got 3 times from my father 1003 times. I needed to feel worthy without having to work my ass off for a pretty title to show them. Throughout time I realize I just needed support. That was the main source of protein I was lacking. I was filled up on just one low budget multivitamin instead of the handful I needed. I feel like life has become a wasteland for people who are greedy. Life in America has become all about exploiting to the fullest extent. We exploit resources, women, men, children, animals….We decided the economy pack of crap was right for us, but everyone else should have a single serving.

I feel like I need to discover so much more about life. There is the drive that pulls me in a million different directions. I hope it is for a good reason. At least if I experience everything I can I won't be stuck in my box.